Sounds like a great night mate.

One tip I'd give would be to not say: 'fat hanging cunt who should go kill herself'. You probably could have said: "Who said I'm trying to get her?" That way you don't look needy by trying to qualify yourself, and you're not being angry either :P But obviously, hindsight is a fucking bitch. Maybe say: Excuse me? in a playful tone first to give yourself time to think of a comeback.

Its great that you had a dance off.. a lot of lads wont even dance never mind compete I tend to dance more when I'm drunk..

Not sure why you bailed on the two hot girls, maybe you just felt inside you're not ready for that kinda thing yet. Like, right in the deep end kind of thing. Just my two cents